I would say that I am a forgetful person by nature. It’s not just me who thinks this. This is backed by those around me throughout my life: teachers would get frustrated with me for forgetting, once again, my assignment that was due several days ago…doctors have charged me for missed appointments…friends stopped lending me things because I would forget to return them for far too long… and on and on. My poor mother would ask me to get something from our food storage in the basement, then stand at the top of the stairs waiting for me to yell, “What did you want me to get again?” My brother teased me during his speech as the master of ceremonies at my wedding, joking that I had called him that morning to ask, “Wait, who am I marrying again?”
A Weakness Becomes a Problem
Is forgetfulness a weakness? For me, yes. It has caused much embarrassment, worry and concern. What if I forget to give my child their prescribed medicine at the right time? I worry that if I forget to bring the mashed potatoes to the ward Christmas dinner, they won’t have enough. Once, I agreed to fill in for our sacrament meeting chorister weeks in advance. When that Sunday came, I just sat there along with the rest of the congregation, wondering who would be conducting the music as the pianist began playing.
The power to turn a weakness into a strength comes from our friend and Saviour, Jesus Christ. “And if men come unto me [Jesus Christ] I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.” (Ether 12:27)
Steps to Making a Weakness Become a Strength
My first step was to humbly admit that my forgetful nature was a weakness and that I needed the Saviour’s help. I knew I needed to be dependable, especially in the church callings I had been entrusted with. I began to see that being forgetful looked a lot like negligence and aloofness. I wanted to do better.
The second step was having faith that this weakness could become a strength, with the help of the Saviour. I sought help in prayer, but I was still too embarrassed to ask anyone else for help. One day, I cried when my unsuspecting husband, Jason, laughed lightheartedly after I misplaced the car keys…again. I told him how embarrassing it was to forget where I put things, and that I felt it was more than just absentmindedness. I asked him, “What if I’m broken? What if this is a mental illness?” I was truly afraid that I couldn’t be fixed.
I had never shared these fears with him before, and I had always tried to laugh about them, just like everyone else. That was my turning point. Looking back on those days, it seems to me that once I admitted to myself and others that I really needed support, help started to flow in from a variety of sources.
Improvement Takes Work and Help
Jason comforted me and said he would help. We discussed helpful techniques: I would be sure to put the keys on the key hooks by the front door as soon as I walked into the house. We put a magnetic list pad on the fridge and a calendar on the side. Weekly, we reviewed our to-do lists on Sunday afternoons. As technology has developed, I’ve learned to record my promises, appointments, and spiritual promptings in my to-do apps and calendars, complete with reminder alarms. I have basically adopted the practice of writing things down as I make plans. Health-wise, we started making better food choices and exercising to help clear some brain fog.
Although I am forgetful, it has also been important for me to remember that I am never forgotten. Jesus Christ has said, “Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee. Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me” (Isaiah 49:15-16). The help I received has been my pathway to turning a weakness into a strength.
This strength has come from knowing I can overcome the embarrassing results of being naturally forgetful by asking for power through prayer and remembering to express my gratitude for the help I receive each day.