I wear a necklace that has the word “limitless” engraved on it. I wear it because so often in life I feel very limited, incapable, and not good enough. I wear this necklace to remind me: “with God all things are possible” (Matthew 19:26). Even though I know this, I often carry around heavy feelings of inadequacy. Usually when those feelings hit, I know that Heavenly Father has a work for me to do and that the adversary is trying to make me think that I am not qualified to be an instrument in God’s hands.
In this particular case, my work was directing a music video for a children’s Christmas song that I wrote called “Born to be a King.” The song is taken from the viewpoint of a child who might wonder what it would feel like to be present when Christ was born. It is a very visual song and allows the listener a chance to picture what it might have been like all those years long ago.
As soon as I knew that I wanted to make a music video for this song, opposition kicked in. And with opposition came fear. I worried that the weather would not agree with our timelines. I worried that not enough children would volunteer to be a part of the video. I worried that we would not be able to find actors. I worried about costumes, location, set pieces, and that people wouldn’t like it. I worried and then worried some more. It caused a dark cloud to cover me as I struggled to make this a beautiful experience. As the director, it was not a beautiful place to be.
People would tell me, “It will come together; it always does!” In my head I would respond, “Yes, at the expense of someone’s sanity!” It was then that I realized that I needed to have more faith. As President Russell M. Nelson has prescribed, “Faith is the antidote for fear” (Ensign, May, 2014). It was time to stop relying on myself and thinking I could do this on my own and start putting my faith in Heavenly Father and His plan for this journey. I was going to learn what He wanted me to learn. As soon as I was okay with that, my fear dispersed, and things really started coming together. Not only that, I was even enjoying the journey.
I remember my biggest worry was that we did not have a baby to play the role of the infant Saviour. It was days before the shoot, and our original baby could no longer participate due to sickness. I had been praying in faith to know whom I could ask to volunteer their relatively new baby. I could only think of one person. A friend of mine just had twins not even a week earlier. Twins! There was no way I could ask that of her, but her name kept coming to my mind. I kept praying: “Please give me another name! I can’t approach this person!” But the answer was the same.
It took an incredible amount of faith to connect with my friend and explain my situation. The more frequent words that came out of my mouth were: “No pressure!” and “You really don’t have to!” Why was there so much fear? Again, I knew I needed to replace fear with faith. As soon as I did that, I began to feel like God was in charge again. After my desperate ramblings, my friend was happy to say “Yes” and have her babies be a part of this experience. This was just one of the many times I had to remind myself to replace my fears with faith and let God take over.
Another stressful time was the day of the shoot. It was beautiful all week long, and then the weather dipped down to zero and was calling for snow. In September! This is Alberta, so it wasn’t terribly shocking. But it was terribly inconvenient. I had over sixty children on the set, along with our newborn baby to consider. I reminded myself to have faith. I knew that everything would be okay. From the beginning, I had arranged to have about seven or eight parents on set for crowd control in case a child needed to use the washroom or needed their hair brushed.
Their volunteer jobs became a lot more demanding, however, as the weather proved to be more difficult. Who cares about hair being brushed when there are noses to be wiped and hands to be kept warm? It was not ideal, but because I had these amazing parents on set, I felt prepared to handle it. Again, faith calmed my fears. In the end we managed to find a few clips we could use of the children looking not too wind-blown.
I think what I learned most from this experience is that no matter how many times I allowed my worries to overpower me, Heavenly Father was right there to remind me to choose faith. Just as my necklace reminds me, I can do great things as an instrument in God’s hands. It’s certainly easier to do great things knowing He is there to guide and direct my path. I need my Heavenly Father always. When I put my faith in Him, my fears can fade away, and all things truly are possible.
You can watch “Born to be a King” by clicking the link below:
Week 4: Light your faith
Jesus Christ spent much of His ministry caring for individuals, one by one.
By following the example of the Light of the World, your faith in Jesus Christ will grow brighter and brighter.
As we reach out to give as Jesus gave, we ultimately fan the flame of our own faith. This week, reflect on ways following Jesus Christ has brightened your life and discover a few more ways to light your faith.
Learn more about how you can light your faith by following this link: